Wisdom of Pain

He who learns must suffer

And even in our sleep

Pain that cannot forget,

Falls drop by drop upon the heart

And in our own despair, against our own will

Comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God
 ~Aeschylus

The Greeks, well known for their love and quest of wisdom, still reign among the classics. One of their common themes, pain, is lauded for it's role in making men stronger and wiser. The great Aristotle himself said, 

“We can not learn without pain.” 

Many of us have at least one month that brings personal reminders of pain. The loss of a friend or family member, relationships, career, savings, or health are among the many that drive us to grieve. The return of a month from whence we once suffered tragedy often forces us to relive the torture of loss. 

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Oh if only months were ours to choose. I know of one I’d sure refuse. If you knocked upon my door today, I’d beg for you to turn away. But only after I asked you please, to release the power you hold on me. I’d barter hope for my tomorrow. For you once upon my heart brought sorrow. Each year you scoff reminding me, of how I lost what was to be, and I look up at the barren tree, and curse once more the month of thee. -j.lauber

My month just knocked at my door today and unfortunately I am not given the option to turn it away. I now endearingly call it my Charles Dickens month, ‘Bah humbug’ I say for it is often the painful reminder of dreams lost. But after a few bah humbugs and tears I focus instead on a Dickens quote from his great classic “A Tale of Two Cities.” Years have now passed and November has become the 'best of times, worst of times’ for me for these best of times are those worst of times developing a wisdom only pain and struggle can bring.

C.S. Lewis once wrote, “We can ignore even pleasure. But pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”  And it is through this pain that we most often stop to hear God speak. It is through the pain that one can realize that this isn’t all about my comfort but about making me better. These struggles make us stronger, and we should embrace them to challenge us to live and grow. 

The whispers of can’t may still come our way but like the little engine that could, ‘I think I can, I think I can” becomes fueled all the stronger by the hope that the next horizon, a new month, often with the same name, no longer reminds of pain but gain.

So whether your month is still sometimes cold or whether you've grown from pain untold, remember roses will bloom again. Maybe not today, but one day a November will knock on my door and I won’t turn it away. ‘I can’ and ‘I did’ I shall shout and this time I’ll ask it to stay.

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"The strongest oak tree of the forest is not the one that is protected from the storm and hidden from the sun. It's the one that stands in the open where it is compelled to struggle for its existence against the winds and rains and the scorching sun." ~Napoleon Hill